Homilies on Matthew, Homily 60

“If your brother wrongs you, go and tell him what he has done wrong, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.” For since He had spoken so forcefully against those who cause offense and had made them afraid in every way, He needed to keep those who had been offended from becoming careless in turn. They might suppose that all the responsibility lay with others and fall into another vice, becoming self-indulgent, wanting to be catered to in everything, and running onto the shoal of pride. Do you see how He restrains them too, and commands them to discuss the faults between the two of them alone, so that the testimony of many people will not make the accusation more serious and provoke the other person to resist and remain unwilling to change? That is why He says, “Between you and him alone,” and, “If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.” What does “If he listens to you” mean? If he condemns himself, if he is persuaded that he has done wrong. “You have gained your brother.” He did not say, “You have had enough revenge,” but, “You have gained your brother,” to show that hostility causes a loss to both. For He did not say, “He alone has gained himself,” but, “You too have gained him.” In this way He showed that both had been losing before this: one had lost his brother, and the other his own salvation. He also advised this when He sat on the mount. At one point He brought the person who had caused the pain to the person who had been hurt, saying, “If you are standing by the altar and remember that your brother has something against you, go and make peace with your brother,” and at another He commanded the person who had been wronged to forgive his neighbor. For He taught people to say, “Forgive us our debts, just as we forgive our debtors.” But here He is arranging another approach. For now He does not call on the person who caused the pain, but brings the person who was hurt to him. Because the wrongdoer would not easily come to apologize, out of shame and embarrassment, He draws the other person to him, and does so in a way that also corrects what has happened. He does not say, “Accuse him,” or, “Bring charges against him,” or, “Demand that he make amends and give an account,” but, “Tell him what he has done wrong.” For anger and shame have intoxicated him and left him in a kind of stupor. You, who are healthy, must go to the person who is sick, hold the hearing in private, and offer a remedy he can readily accept. For “Tell him what he has done wrong” means simply, “Remind him of his error.” Tell him what you have suffered at his hands. If this is done as it should be, it is the act of someone making allowances for him and earnestly drawing him toward reconciliation. What, then, if he refuses to listen and chooses to remain stubborn? “Take one or two others with you, so that by the mouth of two witnesses every word may be established.” For the more shameless and defiant he is, the harder we should work to cure him, without anger or indignation. In the same way, when a doctor sees that a disease is persistent, he does not give up or lose patience, but makes even greater preparations. This is what He commands us to do here too. Since you proved too weak on your own, strengthen yourself by bringing these others. Surely the two are enough to convict the person who has sinned. Do you see how He seeks the good both of the person who has been hurt and of the person who caused the pain? For the truly injured person is the one held captive by his passion; he is the one who is sick, weak, and infirm. That is why He repeatedly sends the other person to him, now alone, now with others, and, if he persists, even with the church. For He says, “Tell it to the Church.” If He were seeking only the wronged person's benefit, He would not have commanded him to forgive someone who repents seventy times seven times. He would not so often have appointed so many people to correct the other's passion. Instead, if the man remained unwilling to change after the first conversation, He would have left him alone. But as it is, He commands them to try to cure him once, twice, and three times: now alone, now with two, now with more. That is why He says nothing like this about outsiders, but says, “If anyone strikes you on your right cheek, turn the other to him too.” Here, however, He takes a different approach. Paul says, “What have I to do with judging outsiders too?” But as for the brothers, he commands us to tell them what they have done wrong, avoid them, and cut them off if they will not obey, so that they may be ashamed. This is also what Christ Himself does here when He makes these laws about the brothers. He appoints three people over the man as teachers and judges, to explain to him what he has done during his drunkenness. For although he himself said and did all those unreasonable things, he will need others to explain them to him, just as a drunk person does. For anger and sin cause greater frenzy than any drunkenness and throw the soul into greater confusion. Who, for example, was wiser than David? Yet even he did not recognize it when he sinned, because his lust kept all his powers of reason under its control and filled his soul like smoke. So he needed a lantern from the prophet, and words to remind him of what he had done. Here too, then, He brings these people to the sinner to reason with him about what he has done. 2. But why does He command this person to tell him what he has done wrong, rather than someone else? Because he would listen more calmly to this man, the one he has wronged, hurt, and mistreated. People do not respond in the same way when someone else tells them how they have wronged a person they have insulted as when the insulted person himself does so, especially when that person is alone in confronting them. For when the very person who should demand justice against him appears instead to be concerned for his salvation, this will do more than anything in the world to make him ashamed. Do you see that this is done to reform him, rather than to give him the punishment he deserves? That is why He does not immediately command the man to take the two with him, but only after he has failed on his own. Even then He does not send a crowd against him, but adds no more than two people, or even one. Only when he has scorned them too does He bring him before the church. He is so concerned that we should not expose our neighbor's sins. He could indeed have commanded this from the start, but to prevent that exposure He did not command it then. He appoints it only after a first and second warning. But what does “By the mouth of two or three witnesses every word will be established” mean? You have enough testimony. He means that you have done your whole part, that you have left undone nothing that was yours to do. “But if he refuses to listen to them too, tell it to the church,” that is, to its leaders. “But if he refuses to listen to the church, treat him as you would a pagan and a tax collector.” For after this, such a person's disease is incurable. But please notice how He everywhere uses the tax collector as an example of the greatest wickedness. Earlier too He says, “Do not even the tax collectors do the same?” And again, further on, “Even the tax collectors and the prostitutes will go before you into the Kingdom of Heaven,” meaning those who are utterly rejected and condemned. Let those who rush after unjust profits and pile up excessive interest on excessive interest listen. But why did He place him with these people? To comfort the person who was wronged and to frighten the wrongdoer. Is this, then, the only punishment? No; listen to what follows too. “Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in Heaven.” He did not say to the ruler of the church, “Bind such a man,” but, “If you bind,” entrusting the whole matter to the injured person himself; and the bonds remain unbreakable. So the wrongdoer will suffer the worst evils. But the blame lies with the person who refused to be persuaded, rather than with the person who called him to account. Do you see how He has bound him with a double restraint, both by the retribution here and by the punishment to come? But He has made these threats so that these things will not happen: fear of being cast out of the church, of the danger of the bond, and of being bound in Heaven is meant to make him gentler. Knowing these things, he will put aside his anger, if not at the beginning, then at least as he faces these many courts. That is why, I tell you, He has appointed a first, a second, and a third court over him, and does not immediately cut him off. Even if he refuses to listen to the first, he may yield to the second; even if he rejects that, he may fear the third. And even if he disregards this, he may be frightened by the retribution to come and by the sentence and judgment that will come from God. “And again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father who is in Heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in their midst.” Do you see how He gives us another motive for putting aside our hostilities, removes our petty disputes, and draws us toward one another? He does this not only through the punishment He has mentioned, but also through the good things that spring from love. For after announcing those threats against contentiousness, He sets out here the great rewards of harmony, if indeed those who agree can even prevail with the Father concerning what they ask and have Christ in their midst. “Are there really no two people anywhere who agree?” On the contrary, there are such people in many places, perhaps even everywhere. “Then why do they not obtain everything?” Because there are many reasons for their failure. They often ask for things that are not good for them. Why are you surprised if this happens to others, when it happened even to Paul, who heard, “My grace is enough for you; for my strength is perfected in weakness”? Or they are unworthy to be counted among those who heard these words and do not do their own part. He is looking for people like those who heard Him; that is why He says, “Of you,” meaning the virtuous, those who display an angelic way of life. Or they pray against those who have wronged them, seeking redress and revenge. This sort of thing is forbidden, for He says, “Pray for your enemies.” Or they ask for mercy while they have sins they have not repented of. They cannot receive it, whether they ask for it themselves or others who have great confidence before God plead for them. So even Jeremiah, when he prayed for the Jews, heard, “Do not pray for this people, because I will not hear you.” But if all these conditions are met, and you ask for things that are good for you, do your whole part, live an apostolic life, and have harmony and love toward your neighbor, you will receive what you ask for; for the Lord loves humanity. 3. Then, because He had said, “Of my Father,” He added, “For wherever two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in their midst,” to show that He Himself gives, and not only the One who fathered Him. What then? Are there not two or three gathered together in His name? There certainly are, but rarely. For He is not speaking merely of gathering together, nor is that all He requires. As I said before, He certainly also requires every other aspect of virtue, and besides, He is very exacting about this gathering itself. What He says amounts to this: “If anyone makes me the main reason for his love for his neighbors, I will be with Him, if he is virtuous in other respects.” But now we see that most people have other motives for friendship. One loves because he is loved; another because he has been honored; a third because someone has been useful to him in some other worldly matter; a fourth for some similar reason. But it is hard to find anyone who loves his neighbor sincerely and as he should for Christ's sake. For most people are bound to one another by their worldly affairs. Paul, however, did not love this way, but for Christ's sake. So even when he was not loved as he himself loved, he did not stop loving, because he had planted a strong root for his affection. But that is not how things stand with us now. If we investigate, we will find that most people have almost any reason for friendship rather than this one. And if anyone gave me the power to conduct this inquiry among such a large crowd, I would show that most are bound to one another by worldly motives. This is clear from the things that cause hostility. Because they are bound to one another by these temporary motives, they are neither devoted nor faithful to one another. Insults, loss of money, envy, love of empty glory, and every such thing that comes along sever the bond of love, because they find no spiritual root. If the root were spiritual, no worldly thing would destroy what is spiritual. For love for Christ's sake is firm, unbreakable, and impregnable, and nothing can tear it apart: not slander, not dangers, not death, nor anything else of this kind. Even if someone who loves this way suffers ten thousand things, he will keep looking to the reason for his love and will not stop. Someone who loves because he is loved puts an end to his love when something painful happens. But someone bound by love for Christ's sake will never stop. That is why Paul also said, “Love never fails.” For what can you say? That he insults you when you honor him? That after receiving your kindness, he intended to kill you? Even this moves you to love him more, if you love for Christ's sake. For the things that destroy love in other cases become reasons for love here. How? First, because such a person gives you an opportunity to earn rewards; second, because someone in that condition needs more help and much care. That is why I say that someone who loves this way does not ask about the other's race, country, wealth, love for him, or anything else of the kind. Even if he is hated, insulted, or killed, he continues to love, because Christ is enough of a reason for his love. That is also why he stands steadfast and firm and cannot be overthrown, keeping his eyes on Him. For Christ too loved His enemies this way: the stubborn, the hurtful, the blasphemers, those who hated Him, those who would not even look at Him, those who preferred wood and stones to Him. He loved them with the highest love, beyond which no other can be found. For He says, “No one has greater love than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” And see how He continues to treat with kindness even those who crucified Him and treated Him with contempt in so many ways. He even speaks to His Father on their behalf, saying, “Forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And after these things, He also sent His disciples to them. Let us imitate this love too, and keep our eyes on it, so that by following Christ we may receive both the good things here and those to come, by the grace and love for humanity of our Lord Jesus Christ, to whom be glory and might forever and ever. Amen.